Coffee Shop Confidence

Met Sean at a coffee shop today, like I’d been hoping I would. After a few minutes talking to him, I realized something. I am envious of his lifestyle: thrift store chic, nice car, nice house, beautiful gardens, getting ready to go to Manhattan for the weekend. On top of that, he’s a handsome man and very sexy. It’s not that I see myself as lacking in any particular area, it’s just that I would like the disposable income to travel and play a little more seriously and a little more often. I can see the potential, but there is a sadness there too because I question whether Hi and I will ever be able to do together the kind of travel that I need to stay spiritually, emotionally, and physically well.

8/11/04

Valley View, Santa Fe, and California Dreamin’

Talked to N.W.’s friend Lawrence last night.  He recommended that I check out Valley View, Colorado because it’s a “hippy heaven” and “dirt cheap” too.  He also suggests that I would really love Santa Fe, New Mexico.  He said for visual arts it’s as important as New York or Los Angeles, and it only has ~100,000 residents.  L. said that New Mexico is great because the desert is very forgiving and has a softness and beauty that’s uncanny — and safe as well.  It is unlike Arizona or Nevada where the desert is pretty hard and unforgiving.  If you fuck up in AZ, L. says, the consequences can be dire, whereas in NM, you can screw up without too much fear.  The landscape of New Mexico is more forgiving than AZ and NM, but it still has that incredible powers that desert landscapes so often have.

While in Santa Fe, L. suggests that I venture into the hills above to an incredible bath house called 1000 Ways (1000 Waves?).  L. said that it’s a place of many rooms and quiet spaces that are constructed in such a way that you never quite take in the full experience of it.  They also have coed, nude hot tubs.

He or someone said something as well about the power of places with hot springs.

*

2:32 pm

I told G. of my plan a few days ago and saw the lines of consternation form and then dissipate as I told her I was hoping to move to California with no job waiting for me there — just a really strong desire and an opportunity for growth.

I asked her advice about herb books for the area, and she told me what I had suspected already — Michael Moore is the man.  She suggests Herbs of the Pacific West, Herbs of the Mountain West, and one other.

She also mentioned San Francisco’s Chinatown as being a good place to study.  Local to Berkeley, there is also a herbalist, a protege of Michael Moore’s, that G. describes as totally brilliant.  His name, I think she said, is A.S. and G. describes him as a “real (or really?) radical urban herbalist” who specializes in junkies and HIV cases and who makes no bones about practicing medicine without a license.  He does this and is defiantly upfront about this.  G. also says that he knows physiology really, really well, and if you study with him or at his school you will have to go back to school seriously in order to make it through.  G. also gave me her email address and asked that I keep up.